Emails - 7/17

I was outside for the first time in a few weeks yesterday, when, out of nowhere, I heard these blaring trumpets and horns coming from the sky.  Finally, the apocalypse is upon us.  There is no other explanation for it!  It’s about time if you ask me!

Becky D

I didn’t know what I looked like for the first 10 years of my life because my parents don’t believe in mirrors.  Now my psychiatrist says that I have complex and lash out by emailing random websites my nudes seeking there approval.  Check out the attachments and you’ll see what I mean.

Carol A

Ever since my girlfriend’s sex change, I try to stay away from anything mammary-shaped: cantaloupes, bowling balls, globes, etc.  I don’t want to be tempted by anything that would make me wish for what she used to be and look like.  I just have to accept him for who he is now.  I don’t have any other option.

Manny W

I was in the shower after digging in my neighbor’s backyard last night, when I noticed that I am getting a lot of odd hair growth across my body - places like my elbows and palms.  But then, I realized I was just loosing hair due to my chemotherapy and it was sticking to my wet skin.  Thank goodness!  That had me worried for a second!

Charles T